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May 26/12 - Missing You Birthday Boy

5/26/2012

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Another year passes...Another candle on the cake...seems simple enough...but for Darrel, and more and more children who fought, or are still fighting the battle against childhood cancer, this is not the case.  Today, Darrel could, should, and would have turned 12, if neuroblastoma had not devastated his little body, my family, and every thought of every day since he 
was first diagnosed back in September 2005.  Though there will be no song to sing, we have memories, both the good and the bad, and my son to honour...and that is exactly what we will do.  While there won't be any celebrations or parties, the best thing we can do today, and everyday, is to dust ourselves off,  and greet the morning with a smile and laugh...just like Darrel did.

Both Kira and Lauren continue to grow, mature, thrive, and make their parents proud, whether successful or not, with all they do!  Each enjoys being in the spotlight: Kira with her drama and improv aspirations; and Lauren with her baton twirling (including winning the Provincial Title earlier this month). With all they have been through at such young ages, it is surprisingly wonderful  how well the cope with it all, in addition to the rollercoaster of
life that comes with being teenage girls.

Unfortunately, time has not been so kind to another family member, Darrel's dog Lady.  Though she is only seven, and gave birth to 6 healthy puppies last summer, Lady's vision is becoming increasingly impaired.  At first it was slightly amusing when she started to miss treats or food being tossed at her (bouncing off her head sometimes), but as it became more apparent that it was because of a physical problem, the laughing stopped.  There is a whitish glaze/film over her eyes, and we believe that Lady has cataract eye disease.  Seeing her 
wandering around hopelessly looking for the ball that is right in front of her quite depressing to the family.  I never was a dog person, but Darrel wanted one after he was diagnosed, so Lady (and her puppy Bella that we kept) became a part of the family.

Another recent sad note, in a more general way, has been the "Warrior Eli" Hoax   http://warriorelihoax.wordpress.com  that has rocked much of  the online Childhood Cancer Awareness (CCA) community.  For those of you that  are unaware, scammers created an elaborate campaign in support of "Eli Dirr",  who ontop of battling cancer, had various other
hardships confronting his  family.  Many in the online community had opened their hearts and bank accounts  to assist the needs of the Dirrs.  Over the Mother's Day weekend, the hoax was exposed when the imposters' stories went too far.  It has since come out that  information and photos of several real families (including the majority from a  South African blogger) were complied to create the "Eli" persona.This has made  any of us re-evaluate our Facebook, Twitter, and other social media sites  friendships, and group memberships to protect our own children from being  tainted by this scandal as well.  I deleted and/or was deleted by over 50 people from the CCA community in the wake of Eli. In most cases, it wasn't because of  anything that these individuals said or did, it just was the fact I didn't have  enough of a personal bond with them to know they were legitimate.  There are  many known scammers out there as well (who I won't honour with posting their  names on Darrel's page), but Eli caught most of us off guard.  Perhaps, after  this crisis has passed, things may go back to the way they were, but in the  meantime, there are Real Kids and Real Families that need our and your help to get through the unpleasant journey that may be before them. 

The local Relay for Life, in support of the Canadian Cancer Society, will be taking place on June 15th -16th in Fergus. The Relay for Life has proven to be a big part of  the Healing Process for my family. We have taken part each year since Darrel was  taken from us, and this will be our 5th time. Our family and friends join  together to remember his life, and what it could have been.  On April 25th, I  was asked to be on The Grand 92.9 with one of the Relay organizers to talk about  what the event meant to me.  It was a brief segment, probably not heard by many,  but if it changed one person's view on the cause, it was more than worth it!!

Team Darrel Relay Page:  http://convio.cancer.ca/goto/team-darrel


There are many within the online community who continue to shun involvment in any functions by the Canadian and American  Societies because of their poor track records in funding the various childhood cancers.  While I fully realize the dollars are disproportionally 
distributed among the various types of cancers, the Relay is still an excellent way for the family to pull together, and spread awareness about childhood cancer at the same time. I am personally active with The James Fund, Childhood Cancer Canada, and St Baldrick's, but the Relay is sometimes more than enough for the other family members (and is the only event of its kind that actually takes place in a same town like ours).  We all try to do our part, and everyone channels their energies and places their priorities in a different order.  Spreading Awareness is about Spreading Awareness...we should not be critical of others methods in the aim and goal is true and the same. 

In addition to being Darrel's Birthday, today is also the 11th Annual Mitchell Fraser Memorial Slo Pitch Tournament in Solina, Ontario (in honour and memory of Mitchell, lost to neuroblastoma in December 2001).  This will be my second year participating in the event, and I am looking forward to once again getting together with many of The James Fund families.  Though I might communicate with many them online throughout the year, this one of the gatherings that most people try to make an appearance at.  I'm certainly not much of a ball player, but it will be a fun, yet sometimes emotional day for all involved.

http://www.durhamregion.com/sports/article/1361285--mitchell-fraser-memorial-set-for-saturday-in-solina

Online Donations are be made at:
http://my.sickkidsdonations.com/personalPage.aspx?registrationID=1371965#.T2NNt6Bqgyo.facebook
 

Thanks Again to everyone who takes the time to read my blogs and posts here on the main website, Facebook, or on Twitter.  These entries have helped me quite a bit over the years, and I've been told they have helped others too.  While I may not have new Darrel stories to share with you anymore, all that he was continues to shape the lives of my family on an almost daily basis...probably as much, or even more than if he still sat at the dinner table with us each night.

Happy Birthday Darrel!!

Love and Miss You Little Man 
 
 
Video by Debbie Tompkins
Make a video - it's fun, easy and free!
www.onetruemedia.com
1 Comment

Who You'd Be Today - Kenny Chesney

5/22/2012

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I'm not much of a follower of Country Music, but a friend brought "Who You'd Be Today" to my attention when she made a Graphic for Darrel using the lyrics this song.

*************************

Who You'd Be Today - Kenny Chesney

Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
I feel you everywhere I go.
I see your smile, I see your face,
I hear you laughin' in the rain.
I still can't believe you're gone.

It ain't fair: you died too young,
Like the story that had just begun,
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you,
All the hell that I've been through,
Just knowin' no-one could take your place.
And sometimes I wonder,
Who you'd be today?

Would you see the world?
Would you chase your dreams?
Settle down with a family,
I wonder what would you  name your babies?
Some days the sky's so blue,
I feel like I can talk to you,
And I know it might sound crazy.

It ain't fair: you died too young,
Like the story that had just begun,
But death tore the pages all away.
God knows how I miss you,
All the hell that I've been through,
Just knowin' no-one could take your place.
And sometimes I wonder,
Who you'd be today?

Today, today, today.
Today, today, today.

[Instrumental Break]

Sunny days seem to hurt the most.
I wear the pain like a heavy coat.
The only thing that gives me hope,
Is I know I'll see you again some day.

Some day, some day, some day.
0 Comments

    The majority of all these entries were written by Darrel's father, Stephen.  For those that are not, efforts have been made to give proper credit where it is due.

    The bulk of the posts are in the June 2011 Archives Section, as that is when I transferred them over to this site.  Category Tags should allow you to find entries easier.

    I've tried to correct spacing issues on many of the entries, as most of the older ones have been copied from different sites I've used in the past. I apologize if some have been overlooked.

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